Why I’m Not a Craft Blogger

I tried to make my daughter curtains.  Out of a tablecloth.  That sounds simple enough, and I know how to sew, thanks to 4-H, but they turned out horribly. And it wasn’t exactly my fault.

I sewed straight lines.  I measured correctly.  I even matched the thread.

I did not, however, choose the right material for the job.  The tablecloth I made them from was a vinyl table cloth, and the curtains stayed stiff and straight against her window.  They would not budge open, and they rebelled when tied back.  My purpose was to make “blackout” curtains to block the early morning and late evening sun.  They did that, but they also ended up blocking the sun all day long.

But they were a pretty pink paisley pattern.

We tolerated them for about a year.  I would go in every morning and tug them apart, willing them to stay on the side of the curtain rod.  They would slowly inch back into place, covering the light.  I tied them with ribbons at some point, but it was like bunching thick wrapping paper together and expecting it to look elegant.  They were a failure.

It’s too bad I didn’t take any pictures of them before I threw them away.  On the bright side, they looked better than this:

And that’s why I’m not a craft blogger.